Abroad again with my family here in Norway. I thought this feeling is the same with my previous experience. A memory of joy and a sad feeling while you cant be in Malaysia with your family.
Yet i feel some different.
An angle which strikes my heart while im thinking it deeply...
The character always a background role, yet it surely impacted the story line
A pile of memories come to search for the wonderful...
It wasnt the food that i was dreamt about
Abah absent is something that im coping with
I feel the need of being shoulder to my mum...
While myself misses the shoulder that i suppose to seek
This not the time for us to tears for the absent..
yet, it should be a day that we feel enjoyment of what we went through
but it just that....
i missed abah a lot...
On the last eid,
he cried while i hold his hand...
it was unusual and i spotted the different
the same on last look at the airport,
he cried and i felt the changing of his voice...
when i turn my face back while we walk to the passport control
i looked at his face...
a face of telling me something
..."Ibal, jangan diri&family baik2....abah sayang ibal..."
"Abah nak pergi dah..."
a look which I kept till this moment..
Forgive Abah's sin
Keep he warm with your light and let he be among those who you accepted in Jannah
Tell my Abah that i missed him so much
Love him so much
Feel of hugging him for the last...
keep my mum calm
let she be strong and so my siblings
Forgive us and our family...
Accept our deed in the last Ramadhan..